You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

SOCIALISM

You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all the cows. The government gives you a glass of milk.

FASCISM

You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk.

COMMUNISM

You share two cows with your neighbors. You and your neighbors bicker about who has the most "ability" and who has the most "need." Meanwhile, no one works, no one gets any milk and the cows drop dead of starvation.

DICTATORSHIP

You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.

PURE DEMOCRACY

You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.

REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY

You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.

BUREAUCRACY

You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

CAPITALISM

You don't have any cows. The bank will not lend you money to buy cows because you don't have any cows to put up as collateral.

PURE ANARCHY

You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.

ANARCHO-CAPITALISM

You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

CORPORATE CAPITALISM

Both cows are bloated with toxic steroids. They are set out to graze on privatized public parks, release massive amounts of flatulence that destroy the ozone layer, die from excess ultraviolet light, and are processed into meat-like products that look great as a result of unprincipled marketing strategies. You mortgage your artificially devalued farm at high interest rates to buy meat, and you consume the poisoned material and develop terminal illness because there is no health care plan to treat you. The corporate management uses your purchase price to acquire THEIR meat from cows raised "naturally" on tree-free rain forest land outside of the country where labor and resources are cheap.

a bit of Net-icism